Dear Crystal Meth,
You have given me a lot of different things through the years.
You gave me a voice and you give me confidence.
You gave me focus and energy. When I felt like I couldn’t be useful, you made me useful.
You gave me a place to hide and feel secure. You let me escape reality and find comfort in madness and chaos.
You’ve also taken away so much from me.
You took my happiness and my self-confidence. You took me away from my family.
You took my morals and values. You almost took my life.
You helped me with grieving a loss and helped me feel invincible for so long.
I forgot the years before you and lost myself in this toxic relationship.
You controlled me and put me in situations I would never put myself in.
I feel a lot of grief when I think about you. I also have a lot of anger and resentment.
There were times when you made me feel helpless, confused, alone, hopeless and so very sad.
There were also times when you made me want to take my own life.
You made me only care about you and to push away the people I love.
But things have changed now…
I want you to know that every day I’m clean is a victory and that everything you put me through has made me so strong.
I now have Holyoake to guide and support me.
I hope I never go back to you because the day I do could be my last.
Goodbye meth. So long dear “friend”.
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